At Loving Midlife, we help women break free from the cycle of people-pleasing and reclaim their time, energy, and self-worth. This category offers insights, strategies, and support to set healthy boundaries, say no without guilt, and prioritize your own needs. Whether you struggle with overcommitment, fear of conflict, or the need for external validation, we provide the tools to help you build confidence, strengthen relationships, and live authentically.
We were all taught that it’s nice to be nice.But what happens when “nice” goes too far?When the smile stays frozen, the yes feels heavy, and the exhaustion runs deep? This is where pathological people pleasing begins—not just the occasional over-giving, but a deeper, more persistent pattern where your own needs become invisible, even to…
So you’ve done something you feel guilty about… You missed a deadline. Snapped at someone you love. Said yes when you meant no—again. It’s a small moment, and on the surface, it might not seem like a big deal. But hours later, it’s still echoing in your mind. You feel that familiar tug of guilt….
Let’s be honest—“starting over at 50” sounds like something out of a self-help memoir or a movie montage set to an uplifting piano track. Cue the haircut, the spontaneous road trip, maybe a fling with someone who rides a motorbike and doesn’t believe in email. But real life? Real life is messier. Quieter. Braver, in…
In this post, we’ll explore how to put yourself first—gently, without guilt, and in ways that feel true to who you are today. Both of my daughters recently became mothers. I’ve watched their lives shift almost overnight—every thought, every heartbeat now revolving around these tiny creatures who depend on them completely. It’s beautiful. And familiar….
You know that moment when you say “yes” before you even think—and immediately feel the knot in your stomach? That quiet tug that says, “I didn’t really want to do that.” That’s people pleasing. And it’s more than just being nice. It’s a deeply wired pattern, often learned young—praised for being easy, helpful, agreeable. Over…
So, you are finally ready to give up people pleasing. What’s next? When you stop people pleasing, everything changes. It’s like stepping off a treadmill you didn’t realize you were on. At first, it might feel strange. You might even feel guilty for saying no or putting your own needs first. I know because I’ve…
“I am an imposter. I am a fraud.” These words echoed in my mind for years. Despite working as an accountant for over 30 years and excelling in my career, I couldn’t shake the feeling. Why? Because I don’t have that little piece of paper—the qualification that says, “Yes, she’s legitimate.” I never completed my…
My brother is building a house. It’s going to be beautiful—if he ever finishes it. You see, my brother is a perfectionist. He insists on completing every task himself. In fact, he’s taken the term “self-build” to dizzying new heights. And honestly? That’s fine. It’s his passion project, and he’s in no rush. He’s enjoying…
Setting boundaries with parents can feel tricky, especially when you have a close relationship. My mum and I have always been very close. When my daughters were born, she stepped in to help in the most wonderful way, looking after them so I could return to work. I’ll always be grateful for her support during…
Do you ever feel like everyone’s support system but your own? Emotional boundaries help us prevent this by defining where our feelings end and another’s begin. They act as limits for how others treat us and help us manage their emotions without neglecting our own needs. Without strong boundaries, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed, stressed,…
